Tony Robbins Relationship Rules

Here are Tony Robbins ’10 Cardinal Rules of Love’, taken from his blog. Follow these simple rules to create an extraordinary relationship. I recently came across this and wanted to share it with you as Tony Robbins is a man on a mission to teach you how to make your ultimate visions a reality — and create the life that you truly deserve.

“We all stand facing the gap between where we are today and where we want to be in our lives. Perhaps it’s in your career; you want to grow your business and take your professional life to the next level. Or maybe you want to revitalize your body and achieve a state of optimum health. You may even be looking to ignite more passion in your relationship”.

Whatever it is you are looking to improve — your career, your finances, your health or your relationships — Tony can teach you where to find the tools and information to develop your own strategy for obtaining an extraordinary life. That life is achieved not by willpower or mere motivation, but through a continuously evolving cycle of knowledge, action, achievement and reward that will push you to break through all obstacles in your path.

What makes a relationship truly extraordinary? And what weakens, or even destroys, a relationship?

It all comes down to a few simple rules. We all create rules — those things you believe have to happen in a relationship in order for you to be happy. However, when we have too many rules or our rules are determined by what we can get out of the relationship, the relationship can quickly become a nightmare. Instead, if you want a relationship that magnifies the human experience, follow these 10 cardinal rules. And remember — a relationship is not a place you go and get something, but a place you go to give.

  1. Never question the intent or the identity of the person with whom you’re in a relationship or the nature of the relationship itself. Just because you’ve experienced a problem today doesn’t mean the relationship itself is a problem.
  2. Don’t correct your spouse. Instead, interrupt the pattern in a fun and effective way.
  3. Don’t get stuck in a repetitious pattern. If things aren’t working, change your approach – your perception, actions, responsibility frame etc.
  4. Never threaten the relationship.
  5. Commit to CANI (constant and never-ending improvement) in your relationships. It’s the key to fulfillment.
  6. Each day, take pride in your consistent ability to notice, appreciate, and compliment all of the great, wonderful, fantastic, awesome, exciting and unique aspects of your partner.
  7. Never compare your relationship to that of others – a sure formula for disaster.
  8. Remember that all upsets with another person are rules upsets. Decide to value your relationship over your rules. Create a fun pattern interrupt that you and your partner can use in order to change states easily.
  9. Reinforce your sense of connection through positive anchors such as family rituals or annual traditions.
  10. Decide that it’s more important to be in love than to be right.


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